Is your child been affected by your divorce? Find your answer here.

What is your child thinking at this time?

Divorce affects most children in the short run, but research suggests that kids recover rapidly after the initial blow. In a 2002 study a psychologist found that many children experience short-term negative effects from divorce, especially anxiety, anger, shock and disbelief.

With help of a counselor, by the teen years, academic achievement, emotional and behavior problems, delinquency, self-concept and social relationships will go back to assessment equal to children of intact family.

5 signs that children may be having trouble coping include:

  • Feeling sad and crying more than usual

Your child may be sad and cry more, and it may be more difficult than usual to comfort him. He may cry for no apparent reason or in response to what looks to be a minor issue. What makes him cry may not have anything to do with the divorce, but because he is having trouble coping with the divorce, his resources to deal with other smaller problems are diminished.

  • Children of divorce worry more than others

The child may be fearful in situations that did not used to cause a problem. This fear can be experienced as: been scared to go to bed at night, becomes clingy when separating from parent, and tends to worry about bad things happening to the parents.

  • Children might prefer to hide at home rather than socialize

Some children withdraw as they may stop enjoying spending time with friends and doing activities they used to enjoy. They may become more distant from their family, spend more time in their room, or otherwise do things by themselves

  • Children might become oppositional

Another response to stress can be to act up, argue and become oppositional. Children may feel angry or out-of-control, and it may show up in how she interacts with you and others. It might become difficult for parents to manage this behavior at might start getting calls from school that she is getting in trouble. Seeking outside support may help your child learn to talk about her difficulty rather than acting up.

  • Declining school performance

When children struggle with a stressful situation, a decline in school performance sometimes follows. They just have too much on their mind. They have trouble paying attention in class, because they are distracted by what is going on at home. At home, they can’t concentrate on homework, so they fall behind academically. In some cases, they may pretend not to care. In other cases, children feel bad about falling behind, and this now becomes another stressor to deal with. In these situations, it is important to work with the school to make sure the staff understand what is going on with your child.

If you notice a big change in how they are doing emotionally and behaviorally, if what you try to do to support them does not seem to help, and if they are getting worse rather than better, it is good idea to seek help

Additionally, there are some symptoms to be watchful:

  • Prolonged periods of sadness or anger.

  • Prolonged difficulty sleeping or staying asleep. This also includes nightmares and night terrors.

  • Child displays behavior typical of a previous developmental stage as bed wetting, and separation anxiety.

  • Change in school performance.

  • Decrease in social interaction.

  • An increase in physical complaints such as headaches or stomachaches.

  • Change in appetite patterns.

  • Constant anger and oppositional behavior.

  • Child expresses desire to harm himself or others.

Make sure you contact your closest counselor/therapist should these symptoms become a new pattern in your child.

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